Feb
8
2010
Why I Won’t Wear Thumb Rings
Several reasons I won’t wear thumb-rings:
1. Fonzi has the most famous thumb in history – he didn’t wear one.
2. Conflicts with my 4-finger ring.
3. The thumb is the big toe of the hand. You don’t see people with big toe rings!
4. You’ll look like a champion Thumb-Wrestler with a Thumb-Belt on.
5. People will think you are too fancy if you hitch hike.
6. Looks like you broke the finger cuffs in two.
7. No subtle way to accomplish two-digit nose picking.
8. Double thumbs-up move makes you look like EVEN MORE of a douchebag.